on being broken

Throughout the past few weeks as I've been working through the past, bitterness, and forgiveness, I've been reading Joanna Weaver's "Having a Mary Spirit". And I've found some of her thoughts very profound and helpful.

"Meekness: strength under control" (pg. 173)

"Confound me for as long as it takes to make me entirely yours." (p. 174)

"Most of us fear being broken [...] because of our natural instinct for self-preservation, we fight hard to stay intact. Brokenness usually involves pain, and we will do almost anything to avoid that. But the very thing we resist most is the place where humility must begin: with receiving rebuke. With being willing to admit to God, "I am a sinner. I made a mistake." And to others. "You were right. I was wrong. Please forgive me." (p. 177)

"Though it hurts, I'm glad the Lord deals with my pride. And I've learned it's a lot easier when I actually choose to be broken. Jesus alluded to that reality when He warned, "He who falls on this stone will be broken to pieces, but he on whom it falls will be crushed" (Matthew 21:44). When I willingly fall on the Rock and stay there, the Holy Spirit begins adjusting my hidden life so that my outer life lines up with God's Word. The process is uncomfortable and requires patience. But as each area of my life pops into its rightful place, I find relief... and victory. Victory over the need to be perfect. Victory over the need to always be right. For there is a thrill of victory that only comes when we're willing to face the agony of defeat." (p. 176)

"Because while change is costly, the price of not changing is even higher. It is the difference between lying helplessly hogtied to our cherished sins and walking victoriously free from hindering habits. Once again, holiness is all about choices. One choice after another. Saying yes to God and saying no to Satan." (p. 187)

The author described an amazing accomplishment by her developmentally delayed son. And then went on to say, "He belongs to me. That's why God rejoices over our every little step. That's why He tirelessly spends time exercising our faith and stretching us in order to expand our limits. That's why, when we fall, He helps us, picks us up, and encourages us to try again. [...] "Did you see that?" He asks, turning to the angels and pointing to earth. Pointing to you and me. "That's my girl". (p. 198)